Owners

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Active

Low

Debut: 2008

Highlights:

  • Champion: 2010
  • Third Place: 2009, 2015

Lowlights:

  • Unclear if he’s aware he’s still commissioner

Raph

Debut: 2008

Highlights:

  • Champion: 2009, 2016
  • Runner-up: 2010, 2011
  • Third Place: 2017

Lowlights:

  • Once got in a shouting match with a dog (and lost)

Page

Debut: 2008

Highlights:

  • Runner-up: 2008, 2009
  • Third Place: 2010, 2016
  • Highest average finish of original members

Lowlights:

  • Yet to complete a trade with less than 5 weeks of negotiation

GUMO

Debut: 2008

Highlights:

  • Third Place: 2011, 2014
  • Annually voted most popular league member at the draft (because he brings free drinks)

Lowlights:

  • Last defensible transaction occurred in July 2015

Kenye

Debut: 2008

Highlights:

  • Champion: 2013
  • Runner-up: 2015

Lowlights:

  • 2008 season is generally regarded as the worst fantasy season ever, in any sport, in any country, on any planet, in any galaxy, in any dimension

Craig

Debut: 2012

Highlights:

  • By trading away his best players to contenders every season, should at least be able to claim partial ownership of multiple championship teams

Lowlights:

  • Technically inaccurate to describe his status as “perpetual rebuild,” because to rebuild something you have to have built something to begin with

Hutz

Debut: 2012

Highlights: 

  • Champion: 2012, 2015
  • Runner-up: 2014, 2016
  • Third Place: 2013

Lowlights:

  • All-time record holder for making the most people quit just to avoid him (4)
  • Longest active streak of failing to make a fair first offer on a trade (6 seasons and counting)

Heb

Debut: 2013

Highlights:

  • Champion: 2014, 2017 (co-winner)
  • Runner-up: 2013
  • Beard of the Year: 2013 – 2016 (present)

Lowlights:

  • Likes the New England Patriots

 

Little

Debut: 2013 (took over mid-season)

Highlights:

  • 22 Bud Lights at the 2014 draft
  • Most prolific sidebetter in 2013, 2014 and 2016

Lowlights:

  • Finished in 12th place in his first three full seasons in the league
  • Genuinely believed Drew Smyly would contend for the 2016 Cy Young

Billy

Debut: 2014

Highlights:

  • Easily the most honorable member of the league

Lowlights:

  • Drafted Mike Trout ($70) and kept Clayton Kershaw ($56) in 2017 for the sole purpose of flipping them before the season began, netting a grand haul of 2 slots, $34 auction dollars, and 4 players whom he could have had in the draft for a total of $14 (Ryon Healy, James Paxton, Hunter Renfroe and Tyler Glasnow)

JD

Debut: 2016

Highlights:

  • Champion (co-winner): 2017
  • Definitely the nicest person in the league

Lowlights:

  • Familiar only with players who play in the American League Central division

Beaubien

Debut: 2008

Initial retirement: 2012

Return: 2018

Highlights:

  • Champion: 2008 (Inaugural RFK Champion)

Lowlights:

  • Quit the league in 2012 mostly because the commissioner didn’t pat his bottom and feed him ba-ba in a timely manner on a weeknight draft
  • Arguably the worst team name ever to win the championship, with “Nats in ’08” being etched into the trophy for eternity (the 2008 Washington Nationals went 59-102)

Dave

Debut: 2018

Highlights:

Alumni

Mama

Debut: 2008

Retirement: 2017

Highlights:

  • Third Place: 2008, 2012
  • Exceptionally high tolerance for putting up with her immature son and his idiot friends

Lowlights:

  • Last place finish in 2010 and 2016
  • Didn’t responded to an email after 2011

Dewey

Debut: 2013

Retirement: 2017

Highlights:

  • Has been voted Most Valuable .giffer every season since debut
  • Wrote a blistering email that chastised various RFK members while also determining the draft order for the RFKBA fantasy basketball league

Lowlights:

  • Did not make a single transaction that worked out to his benefit
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